Hello dear moms! After the birth of our bundle of joy, our sex life is often not the same as before. Don’t worry! Today I’ll tell you how you can change this and experience even more intense hours together!
How long should I wait to have sex after giving birth?
Childbirth is a particularly heavy burden on the body. Therefore, every mom should take enough time to rest and recover.
If you’re one of those moms who feel the need for sexual contact again soon after the birth. There are a few things you should definitely pay attention to.
If you had a vaginal birth – i.e. a natural birth – I advise you to at least wait until the weekly flow has turned back to normal by itself. This usually lasts between four to six weeks. It is important to give the body this time. Since the injury to the uterus (due to the separation of the placenta/placenta) can also heal during this time. In addition, it is not uncommon for bruises, small tears or abrasions to occur on and in the vagina.
However, if you can’t wait that long, I recommend using a condom to prevent infection. From a medical point of view, it is basically possible to have sexual intercourse with penetration through the penis or other sex toys during the confinement period.
Do you count to the one who gave birth by caesarean section, you should definitely allow yourself enough time to recover. It’s important that you wait for the wound to heal properly. This usually takes at least two weeks for the deep cut to fully close. In this case, I would also recommend waiting until the weekly flow has stopped by itself and the injuries to the uterus have healed here as well.
How does a trained pelvic floor helps me to improve my sex life?
Especially after giving birth, many women suffer from bladder weakness, lack of control over the urethra and anus or even incontinence. This is because your pelvic floor had to go through a lot during pregnancy and childbirth and was very stressed. Now can be the case that many no longer feel the intensity of sex as they did before the birth or often only feel very little or no sexual desire at all. But you don’t have to be satisfied with that! And even if one or the other just the thought of sex is currently too much, I will show you a way back to intimacy, more feeling, sexuality and love.
In addition to the psychological component, the topic of regression of the pelvic floor is the be-all and end-all and is the origin of many problems. If you are now thinking that pelvic floor exercises should also be added to your to-do list, don’t worry: I have good news for you! Training your pelvic floor does not require much and even a few exercises that you can incorporate into your training once or twice a week are enough.
Which different roles plays the pelvic floor during sex?
The pelvic floor plays an essential role during sex and especially during the different phases of orgasm. It is mobilized and tensed during the pre-orgasmic phase. The relaxation afterwards allows the orgasm to occur and the woman to come. When this peak is reached, women automatically experience cramps or the vagina begins to “twitch”. Knowing how to relax the pelvic floor is a guarantee of a quality orgasm. A trained pelvic floor also gives you a better body feeling. You know better how to move and better support your body. If you can tense and relax your pelvic floor in the pre-orgasmic phase. Through your training, this will help you to experience a more intense orgasm! If you want to know more about this, check out our article Sex Life, Body Control and More – Benefits of a Toned Pelvic Floor.
My tip: Be sure to start pelvic floor training during pregnancy. This will make it easier for you to get through pregnancy and childbirth, and it will be much easier for you to return to a trained pelvic floor. If you are not yet training with MOVE IT MAMA, you can get 7 days of free training
How can I properly train my pelvic floor?
There are many different exercises you can do to train your pelvic floor. A few minutes are enough to stimulate your pelvic floor and make your sex life more intense and exciting.
I’ll show you basic breathing, which is one of my favorite exercises and is easy to do without much effort and easy to integrate into any workout.
This is the separate activation of the three pelvic floor layers.
A Lower pelvic floor: Stand upright with feet slightly more than shoulder-width apart and knees slightly bent. Support yourself with your hands on your hips. Inhale, closing body openings in the intimate area as if you were pulling something up through these openings (urethra, vagina & anus). Keep short. Exhale and relax again, keep the starting position.
B Middle layer of pelvic floor: Inhale while pulling the buttocks toward the anus or coccyx. Hold briefly and let it sink back down.
C Upper pelvic floor layer: Now inhale and pull the navel towards the breastbone, at the same time pull the tailbone up the spine towards the top of the head. Hold briefly, then exhale and lower back down.
Duration: 3 to 5 breaths for each variant.
Then you “turn the breath around” and connect it with the classic and also natural abdominal breathing:
A Lower pelvic floor layer: as above, but now exhale and pull a little upwards through the body openings, inhale, release again and “slide out”.
B Middle pelvic floor layer: Exhale, pull up a cloth imaginarily stretched between the buttocks and the pubic bone. Inhale and release.
C Upper pelvic floor layer: exhale pull the belly button towards the breastbone and anus towards the coccyx, inhale and relax downwards again.
How can I relax my body?
For relaxation, against stress or tiredness, I also like to include the following exercise in my training or just do it in between. You will see that you are much more relaxed, less stressed and therefore more open to sexual contact.
- Kneel down and put your butt on your feet. Bend your upper body forward as far as is comfortable. The arms are either stretched out close to the body at the side, hands towards the feet, or you stretch them out far in front. You are now in the child position.
- Now you breathe deeply into your body, belly and sides may and should expand outwards, then breathe out.:.
- When exhaling, you expel the air in short breaths, while you now pull the right ischial tuberosity towards the left pelvic bone, then the left ischial tuberosity towards the right pelvic bone. Alternately short and dynamic. Between each exhalation, you automatically breathe in briefly (you don’t have to actively try to do this). Repeat this 10 times per side. Here we activate the second layer of pelvic floor while stretching the upper body.
- Then take a long breath in and out. Feel your abdominal wall rise, your chest expand and drop as you exhale. You actively pull your navel towards your breastbone, your coccyx towards the top of your head.
These exercises are just a few sample breaths. Of course you can find more in our MOVE IT MAMA app in the App Store and in the Google Play Store and also in my book: ELTERNSEX
I hope I can make your everyday after pregnancy life and sex life little easier and better with these tips and you can enjoy this wonderful time even more now.
Keep it Moving,
Your Birte
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